Slimming down one way or another

I went to my second session of Bikram Yoga (i.e. HOT yoga) tonight.  I really should weigh myself before and after sometime--I think I lost about five pounds of weight just by sweating.  Four of us in the class were newbies--one friend and I had both been one time prior, and a different friend of mine came for the first time, and brought a friend of HERS, also a first-timer.  All three of them did way better than me, but what can I expect.  There are things a body just isn't meant to do, but that a body with as much extra padding as mine has just CAN'T do.

Seriously, try this right now.  Get down on the floor.  I hope you're reading this from a phone, tablet, or laptop.  Now lie flat on your belly, chin on the floor.  Okay, now place your arms at your sides, if they aren't already.  No, not that way, palms DOWN, flat on the floor.  Now slide them under your groin area, palms down, pinkie fingers touching each other.  Hmm...not as easy as you thought yoga would be, huh?  NOW, lift up your head, neck, and ribs, and your feet, legs, knees, and thighs, so that only your hands and hips are touching the floor.  Hold it for 20 seconds or more.  Oh wait, I forgot to mention that you should do this in a SAUNA.  :-)

Here's another one:  Stand up straight.  Lift up your right leg, bend your knee and lift your right foot up in front of your left thigh, as high as you can.  The bottom of your foot should be facing the ceiling, and your right knee should be even with your left knee, pointed toward the floor.  Now slowly and carefully place your right hand, then your left, in a "prayer" position in front of your chest.  NOW, bend over at the waist, and once your torso is parallel with the floor, slowly release your hands from their position down to the floor, balance delicately on your fingertips, and bend your left knee until you are standing on your left toes, with your bottom and everything else above it balancing on your left heel, torso perpendicular to the floor again, back straight.  Release your hands from the floor and return them to prayer position.  Hold that pose a while, yes, in the SAUNA, then gently, carefully, delicately, and gracefully reverse everything, lowering your hands to the floor, extending your left leg to standing, returning your hands to prayer position, and raising your torso to vertical once again.  Do it all again in mirror image.  Then do both sides AGAIN.

*cue warbly picture and harp music, as 90 minutes pass, skipping over many many more poses and repititions*

There, don't you feel relaxed and energized all at once?

Not me--I didn't even do those particular poses, and I feel exhausted.  And hungry.  I had no breakfast, a light lunch, a tiny snack, and am now ravenous.  But hey, I feel at least five pounds lighter.

T minus three days until Trigger is mine, four until he comes home.  Whee!